This past Sunday morning, as I was dressing for a preaching gig, I went through the usual mental calisthenics about what to wear. Nothing cut too low - i.e., no cleavage. Something comfortable, usually slacks or Chico's Traveller's pants, but professional-looking. A jacket that covers the butt if the pants are too clingy. Comfortable but somewhat dressy shoes - glossy brown Dansko clogs.
Then there's the jewelry, especially earrings. Nothing too showy or shiny. Nothing that may swing or sway. Many parishioners have commented to me how my earrings are distracting. (Jesus who?) Which means I usually end up choosing something boring. SO not me. But these are the hoops (no pun intended) I've learned to jump through when dressing for work. I suspect that many women do this, no matter what their profession.
Unlike men, who can put on a suit and tie, or a nice pair of chinos and an oxford shirt, pair of loafers and they are good to go, we women are judged by our hairstyle, hair color, makeup or lack of it, our jewelry, accessories, length of skirt, plunge of neckline, size of waist, hips and bust, and how we clothe all of it - just to make a living and to be accepted in our profession. And of course, many feel free to comment on our appearance rather than on how well we do our jobs. (I even had it mentioned in an exit interview with a church. When I said that it was completely inappropriate for remarks about my mode of dress to be included in my final evaluation, the moderator, with whom I shared a sense of mutual respect and consider a friend, would not take them out.)
So in case you were wondering (because it seems this still is not clear), I am not a man in drag. I am a woman. I have breasts, hips and legs. Get. Over. It. I do not dress for anyone but myself. Among other things, I am also an artist. I dress fashionably, sometimes with a little funk, sometimes with a bit of irreverance, always with flair. I have been blessed with a great head of hair, so I embrace it with gusto. Yes, I have big hair!
I like blue jeans because when I wear them I'm relaxed, just like anyone else. Not one pair I own has rips or tears, and they're always clean. Heck, most of the time on Sunday morning I'm wearing a robe, so what is the difference, really? Many church goers will say that they love being able to attend church wearing whatever is comfortable for them, so why isn't the pastor or minister included in that?
And then there's watching my P's and Q's, censoring my language, making sure I shock no one. Are you kidding me? I work for Jesus, public enemy No. 1, the most dangerous guy in the world, yet you'd think he was hosting the Oscars or running for President by how schmoozy we've made him.
I often wonder that if we allowed Jesus to be human, really human like the rest of us, would we then have a different attitude about clergy and would we clergy then feel like we didn't have to perform, prop up our egos, or think that the church and the gospel are dependent solely on us? Perhaps then we could also affirm our divinity, in that we were made in God's image, not anyone else's, and know our true worth.
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| 1983 |
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| 2010 |
Whatever I'm wearing, I am an image of God. And so are you. Get used to it.
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